Just had a fire, had to call the firefighters

[Steve28]

Ahahahaha!

Wife bought 3 packs of bacon on sale 2 bucks a pound this morning. My 17 year old girl said, hey bacon! So I heated up my bucket o grease and dumped in the bacon. Fucking grease exploded, all over the stove, fire everywhere. I put the top on the pot, turned off the stove but the grease went down into the stove and smoke like you wouldn't believe. Got the kids to open the doors and windows to clear the smoke, but no go. Smoke billowing out of the stove, the air turned black.

At this point I'm still saying shit's okay while apparently swaying side to side with a blank look on my face,

One daughter called the FD while the other daughter got me out of there.

Firefighters were dicks about it too. 'Hey you know grease is dangerous right? People die!', Yeah I didn't know that.

[Steve28]

Anyway, I'm just trying to clean the place up now before the wife gets home. Maybe she won't notice.

[gamgee]

So, how's the bacon? Was it saved?

[bowclan]

Fire Bug

[Mayaca]

Firefighters were dicks about it too.

I find this highly unlikely............. Your judgement might be somewhat skewed by your embarrassment at almost burning down the house.


I could be more kind, but you did waste a bunch of bacon......

[Night]

Why do you need grease to fry bacon?

[Woods Devil]

Don't you people cook lots of fats regularly like walrus blubber and shit?

[Absolutely!]

Ahahahaha!

Wife bought 3 packs of bacon on sale 2 bucks a pound this morning. My 17 year old girl said, hey bacon! So I heated up my bucket o grease and dumped in the bacon. Fucking grease exploded, all over the stove, fire everywhere. I put the top on the pot, turned off the stove but the grease went down into the stove and smoke like you wouldn't believe. Got the kids to open the doors and windows to clear the smoke, but no go. Smoke billowing out of the stove, the air turned black.

At this point I'm still saying shit's okay while apparently swaying side to side with a blank look on my face,

One daughter called the FD while the other daughter got me out of there.

Firefighters were dicks about it too. 'Hey you know grease is dangerous right? People die!', Yeah I didn't know that.

How to kill yourself:

Heat up grease
Put ANYTHING with water in it.

Napalm time.

fucking napalm. You are lucky you aren't dead.

PS glad you're not dead.

[Steve28]

I find this highly unlikely............. Your judgement might be somewhat skewed by your embarrassment at almost burning down the house.


I could be more kind, but you did waste a bunch of bacon......

I still have 2 packs!

[Unclefred]

I could smoke two packs a day, easy.

[Steve28]

Why do you need grease to fry bacon?

It's really fast. Well, when you do it right. Seriously, like 30 seconds instead of 10 minutes in a frying pan. If it wasn't for the fire and us all almost dying I could have done up the 3 pounds in two minutes instead of 30 minutes. I've done it before. I blame the pot for not being big enough to contain its exuberance.

[Steve28]

How to kill yourself:

Heat up grease
Put ANYTHING with water in it.

Napalm time.

fucking napalm. You are lucky you aren't dead.

PS glad you're not dead.

I hear you, but everything anyone ever puts in grease has water in it. The most common example is potatoes. I deep fry them all the time. Bacon is more explody.

[Unclefred]

It's really fast...not being big enough to contain its exuberance.

That's what she said.

[Steve28]

So, how's the bacon? Was it saved?

Almost missed this. The firefighters threw it on the lawn. My kids found it and gave it to the dog. I would have eaten it, but they gave it to the damn dog.

[Smudge]

I'm sorry for your loss.